Everyone knows them, those dirty socks lying around and open tube of toothpaste in the bathroom. Little irritations that slowly undermine your relationship. Because eventually they can become a big problem. It is, therefore, to do the best there is something in an early stage. Because the big problems are ultimately the cause of many relationship fractures.
Irritations are inevitable in relationships. We each have their own values and norms, and also each have a different view of the world. These differences come from our upbringing and are also genetically determined.
Do not you recognize “my mother always cleaned my room” or “my mother did the washing up at home” if you even ask to help in the household.
Gradually, with more and more of those little annoyances that accumulate themselves, creates the feeling of incomprehension and little appreciation. Think of it as an iceberg which grows slowly and eventually a big hole in your stores so once stable ship.
If you want your relationship succeed, it is necessary already talking early about your mutual annoyances. Each offense is in fact a two-way street. And the ability to eliminate irritations lies with both of you.
There are several causes for irritation.
It is very important to distinguish or behavior that you yourself experiencing as vexatious, deliberately, accidentally or unknowingly. Sometimes the cause is not aware that his / her behavior arouses annoyances. Only when you can talk about this behavior, it is possible for both parties to find a cause in both irritation behavior.
In almost every relationship the other person thinks that he is less messy as his partner. Nearly 80% of couples say that clutter is a cause of tension in a relationship. Clutter and clean up is the biggest cause of relationship ruptures.
Some partners want to constantly get confirmed how much you love them. Others just get annoyed when they are told continuously ‘I love you so much. ” Try to find a balance in expressing your feelings for each other.
Everyone is sensitive to valuation. If you feel that efforts are not appreciated or noticed, worse than you about that. You become irritable and feel hurt.
Why do you expect appreciation and what it means to you. When you know the answers to these questions, you can better focus on what you give in this relationship rather than what you receive.
- his bossy
One of the most common complaints in relationships is that partners feel that the other is dominant. That can involve small things, but also to bigger annoyances, such as giving up a career to care for the children.
A relationship is a partnership. And if one of the partners feels controlled by the other being undermines your relationship.
“He / she never talks, but I feel that something is gnawing at him.” Is a common complaint I hear from partners. And like the other irritations intimacy is a two-way street that is essential to the success of a relationship. Unfortunately, some apply at that time to the confrontation tactics to force intimacy. But like other relationship problems is not the right way. Speak in a quiet tone to your partner about what he / she engaged or seeking help from friends or professionals when you can not reach each other.
If your partner flirt he / she is usually looking for attention and fulfillment of desires missing. Flirting can be harmless, but it is often humiliating and thus painful for the partner.
Looking at that time beyond your own hurt feelings and ask yourself, “what we are missing in our relationship.” Sometimes it is simply a question of success stories from work. But maybe it is your lack of quality time for each other.
- Clashing personalities
Many annoyances can be avoided by simply understand each other. You are two personalities who have to accept each other’s differences.
Just make your differences that you are a strong team.
- Lack of fairness
“Why do I always do everything” is an annoyance that everyone recognizes. But if you honestly look at the breakdown of your tasks you might come to understand that surely distributes be honest. Maybe you can do a little more in the household, but take your partner all repair tasks in and around the house to himself. A separation of duties can never be put right in the middle. You have to put together the functions such as finance, maintenance, housekeeping, etc. to distribute honesty.
Annoyances can lead to criticism. And a response to criticism is a feeling to feel attacked or unloved. Rarely suffers criticism for its intended purpose, a change in the partner’s behavior. It is better to discuss annoyances without criticism
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